


I Never Will Marry

by koolmcr



Category: The Last of Us (Video Games)
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Canon Lesbian Character, F/F, Fluff, Lesbian Character, Love, Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-13 08:20:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28900290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koolmcr/pseuds/koolmcr
Summary: Dina sits on the bed, head in her hands.“Ellie, we don’t have to get married if you don’t want to. I get it.”“D…” She sits next to her, shifting JJ who’s happily grabbing at Ellie’s short hair.
Relationships: Dina/Ellie (The Last of Us)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 103





	I Never Will Marry

“Hey, do you wanna get married?”

Ellie looks up from her comic at Dina, face as calm as the long grass in the gentle wind while working on her next embroidery.

“What makes you ask that?”

Her brow furrows. The design is kind of intricate as far as Ellie can see. But she’s not sure if the harder work is what brings the change in her love’s face.

“I dunno. It’s been on my mind. Am I barking up the wrong tree?” Dina laughs, a hint of nervousness.

It wasn’t like she’d never thought about it, getting married. Well, being married. Having a wife, really. It wasn’t really a fathomable possibility when she was younger, not when the days were spent learning to be a soldier, running around trying to find the Fireflies. But being in Jackson for a few years opened up Ellie’s mind to it. Seeing movies with big gatherings and tons of flowers, watching those when she was with Cat made her laugh that so many people needed to be _involved_ in a couple’s life and love. Jackson did have some couples who’ve gotten married though, had ceremonies, so it wasn’t a ritual quite buried in the past. But having the whole town in her business seemed kind of a lot too. Not really something she wanted.

“No. It’s okay. I just, uh, don’t know if I want to get married.”

Dina stops and turns to her, “How come?”

“I just don’t like all the people involved. Remember when Tina and Corey got married? Damn near everyone in town was in the church, setting out food, _crying_? Fuck that.”

“There’s nothing wrong with crying about people loving each other, El. I seem to recall you doing that a few times.”

“That’s different. That’s me crying because I love _you_ , not ‘cause some people I’ve been on watch with three times are in love in a smelly church.”

A cry comes from up the stairs. JJ is up from his nap, probably hungry. Dina sighs and gets up from her chair.

“I’ll get him.”

She starts towards the stairs, Ellie pushing up off the couch after her.

“Well, why do _you_ want to get married?”

“Babe, look around! We kinda already _are._ I love you, and I want to call you my wife!”

“Then call me your wife! We don’t have to say a bunch of dumb shit in front of the whole town for you do to that!”

JJ is screaming by the time they make it up the stairs. Cooing, Dina takes him to her chest, cradling him. Fussy, cranky, not latching.

“Come on bud, what’s the matter? Not hungry?”

He doesn’t stay still in her arms, but when he sees Ellie in the doorway the cries subside.

“Oh, I guess he wants his Mama.”

“You know, sometime I think we’re gonna have to decide which one of us is Mom and which one is Mama.” She moves, taking JJ from Dina’s arms and smiling down at him. “You okay, lil’ spud?”

“Nah, I think we can both be Mama.”

Dina sits on the bed, head in her hands.

“Ellie, we don’t have to get married if you don’t want to. I get it.”

“D…” She sits next to her, shifting JJ who’s happily grabbing at Ellie’s short hair.

“It’s not that I don’t _want_ to. I do. I’m sorry that I said that. But I just don’t see why we have to make a big deal in front of everyone. Why can’t we just decide we’re married and have it be that?”

“We don’t have to do a whole big party for the whole town. I just thought that it’d be nice to have some people who we like. Maria, Tommy, Jesse’s parents…”

“Why do we have to profess our love in front of them though? They already know.”

“It’s more than that El.”

She doesn’t really understand what could be more to it. It isn’t like it was before the outbreak. They didn’t have taxes, health insurance, all the other dumb bullshit that existed before society collapsed. As far as Ellie read, that’s a reason why people got married. Other than being in love.

A tear falls down Dina’s face, “I just...I don’t know. I want people to know other than us. After all we’ve been through, I just want it to be _known_. That I love you, I’m proud of you, I want to be with you. And I thought- at least if it were a few people we trusted that would be great. They know and when they talk about us, other people will know too. That when we die, people will know.”

That unlocks it for Ellie. _People will know._ How long did she go on not knowing she was a lesbian? Having to slowly learn the words and the feelings, learn of the dead community? How long did Dina go on without knowing she was bisexual? Too long for both of them.

Of course people _know_. The kiss at the dance, being called dykes, leaving Jackson for Seattle for Jackson for the farm together. But that’s all gossip and whispers. That’s not initials in the concrete, carved into a tree. That’s not people smiling when they ask how you two are doing. Not something the twelve year old girl she catches following and staring at them whenever they visit the market in town can hold.

Putting her free hand to Dina’s cheek, Ellie looks at her eyes, still downcast and in tears.

“Okay.”

“What?” Dina’s sniffling, eyes meeting Ellie’s.

“Let’s get married.”

“You’re not just saying that because I’m crying, are you?”

“No. I want people to know too. I think that’s...important, you know? That Ellie loves Dina. That we didn’t just fuck off to an abandoned farm for the hell of it.”

She wipes some tears out of Dina’s eyes and presses a kiss to her cheek. JJ squeals happily between them.

* * *

The three of them go into town, tell Tommy, Maria, Robin, Deiji, and somehow Cat to come up to the house next Thursday. Dina picks some daffodils sprouting from the side of the house and tacks them up in the dining room archway, Ellie finds a small rock that’s vaguely heart shaped and breaks it in half, attaching each to the end of some string for a pair of necklaces. They move the table to the den and set up the free chairs in the house for their guests to sit in. And Thursday comes.

They don’t really have “nice” clothes. Ellie’s in a flannel, jeans, Chucks. Dina in the same, but boots. Cat jokes about flannel being the lesbian pattern and it kind of goes past everyone’s heads but Ellie’s. There’s no priest or officiant or anyone in front of them as they face each other. Ellie cries as she reads off of her journal, Dina from memory, both holding hands the whole time. JJ babbles and makes noises from Deiji’s lap as she tries her best to entertain him. Ellie puts a necklace around Dina’s neck, and Dina does the same. They kiss when they’re done. Cat takes a Polaroid. Everyone hugs them. They move the table back into the dining room as Maria and Tommy unsheathe the food they brought. Early dinner so everyone can get back to Jackson before dark. When everyone leaves, Ellie, Dina, and JJ go outside. With her new wife and son sitting on the tractor nearby, Ellie carves a heart into the twisting tree with a “D+E” inside.

All in all, it’s better than Ellie thought it’d be. Hell, maybe it even turned out to be what she wanted. JJ’d be too young to remember it, but if he ever asks about his Mamas’ whole love story they’d have a nice big memory with him in it. She stops referring to Dina by name for a full month, to Dina’s feigned annoyance, just calling her “wife.” Next time they visit town, necklaces in view, they get congratulations from a few people among the stray whispers. The twelve year old girl smiles big, finally greeting them instead of lurking. Ellie smiles back.

**Author's Note:**

> The ball of my mind is rolling, so here's another fic. I Never Will Marry by Odetta is a good song. She does the best version.


End file.
